vicky was listening to the innocence mission last night: july.
(too much light to deny.)
the only light i could recognize at that moment was the fire i kept poking. more coal. come on. stay with me here. it lasted for three hours.
light and advent don't go together so well for me. the light makes me squint; i'm not ready to see.
advent is night vision.
december is wintry spirituality, as richard foster describes it.
from his book, prayer:
to the outward eye everything looks barren and unsightly. our many defects, flaws, weaknesses, and imperfections stand out in bold relief. but only the outward virtues have collapsed; the principle of virtue is actually being strengthened. the soul is venturing forth into the interior. real, solid, enduring virtues begin to develop deep within. pure love is being birthed.
and so vicky and i talked of the innocence mission's birds of my neighborhood and the lyrics to the song "birdless" came to me, after a long absence and made me weep:
when we are lost in carlisle
when we are birdless
flowerless in the spring
and we cannot sing
where are we going tomorrow?
where are we going?
all i can only say
we will be found.
in the meantime, i'm waiting in this holy darkness, for the time when we can scratch the sky..
advent is night vision...not ready for the light. What a thought. Night vision is such a gift. I don't have it in the physical realm (to be able to function in the dark, one's balance must be undisturbed. I have balance issues...)but I cling to it fiercely in the spiritual.
'Something is breaking through, like childbirth; the pushing, the patience, the pain and unbelievable breaking through, the colours of the rainbow, the flower blooming, the doors closing and darkness into light. It is happening. Now. Even while we're in the valley. But we need reminding. Constantly.'
-Sarah Masen
(just in case you hadn't stumbled across this little advent gem)
Posted by: effie at December 4, 2002 08:55 AM
thank you effie. good good words from dearest sarah. i will kiss her head in january for those words.